The Road Not Taken

This situation is like the poem 'The Road Not Taken'
Am I going to NS? Or straight to college after that?
I am still choosing the road that I wanna walk.
Many people suggest me to go for NS 1st
Personally I wish to study first
1. don't miss the time for study
2. maybe is going to rent a house with my friend, so don't let the friend wait, but I am waiting him
But, it is not about my personal
It is about my future
Think twice, maybe NS can make me know myself more
since now I don;t have a passion to study
why don't I go for NS 1st, then come back
maybe I can find myself, know more about myself in it
After come back, maybe I can study well
I need more suggestion
In this holiday, I don't want just a job
I want a really long holiday to really make me rest
To know me more
I wish that I can travel
Travel oversea, at least 3 countries
to see outside, to see myself
To travel alone, this is my wish and hope in this holiday
But I can't do that, I still have many things on my hands
I just want to speak sorry to myself that I can't succeed my dream
My dream is just a empty matter

I gonna cheer myself up, my future is all on my hands now